Chocolates
“I don’t want your chocolate”, she retorts, getting up from the sofa. She looks at him, first with anger and then with disappointment. “It’s not that simple”, her voice breaking, “I’m not that simple”. His apologising face has turned to a confused one. He places the chocolate on the table, and looks down. He dares not to speak, for he is afraid of hurting her more. He doesn’t know what to say, but the silence makes him uncomfortable. “What did I do now?” he asks, in a voice that cannot be comprehended by anyone but her.
“You didn’t do anything”, she sighs, her disappointment dissipates. She slowly walks back to the sofa and sits beside him. “I’m sorry, I just felt like you sometimes simplify my emotions to a point I feel uneasy with”, she explains after a long breathe. “I don’t even want an apology, I know it was a mistake, and that you are not that kind of person, I just want you to understand what hurt me”, she follows, holding his palms in her hands. “I want to be understood by you”, says she glaring straight into his eyes now.
He looks straight into her eyes now, like someone who’s trying to look directly at the sun. This is not the first time this was happening. They have had this moment plenty of time. On their second date, when she was staring in his eyes, as he ranted about his mishaps. The time she pulled back to look at this face, when they kissed for the first time. At the crowded club, where they danced slowly in each other arms. Her intoxicated eyes still carried a depth he could not reach.
Perhaps he was incapable of understanding her, which to his dismay wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t in love, atleast that’s how he sometimes felt thinking about her. Love was something he hadn’t felt. But he was happy with her, and that was enough. She was very happy too. Being with him had given her a joyful life. He would always be making her laugh, taunting her while she quipped, and treated her with extreme kindness. A part of her knew that she missed something. A part of him knew that too. On days when he felt extremely small and detached, he had wished for her to go away, to find a relationship where she could be in love. A relationship where she would laugh a little less, but she would have to explain herself a little less too. A relationship where her glaring eyes would be met with eyes that understood their depth. But he would hurriedly get those thoughts out of his head, and give her a call, to calm his anxiety.
“Hey, do you want to eat chocolates?” he would say.